Useless Things
by heidipoo
Summary: Oleg shows up at Kinzie's warehouse unexpectedly wanting to go to Smiling Jack's for breakfast. While Kinzie is getting ready, he finds something he's not supposed to, but Kinzie's not at all embarrassed. Oleg just can't fathom why Kinzie would need such useless things.


**Author's Note: I've had this oneshot idea for a while but I've been busy with other stories so I haven't had the time to write it. Anyways, here it is my lovelies. This oneshot is inspired by the cut scene where Pierce and the boss are in Kinzie's warehouse and Pierce finds the penetrator. So yeah, enjoy, and I regret nothing. Be sure to check out my other stories, and I'm still taking requests!**

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Ex FBI agent, Kinzie Kensington, sat angrily and rather annoyed at one of her many computers inside her Inner Sanctum, or better known as her warehouse. Her red locks of ginger hair were tied up into a messy bun with some strands of hair in front of her pixie-like face, and she was wearing her usual FBI jacket, only this time with sweats and not jeans.

The small girl sighed in extreme annoyment. She couldn't quite finish this particular hack, and it was agitating her to no end. Usually hacking was one of her specialties; a piece of cake in fact. But now she just couldn't get it right. Frustrated, she shut her computer down and decided she'd try the hack again later. An expert on computers, she didn't know why she was having problems hacking this time. Maybe it was her software? Oh well, for now, she would lay down and try to clear her head.

But her efforts to get rest were to no avail, and soon there was a hard knock on her warehouse door. No one ever came to visit her at the warehouse, unless it was the boss with Saints business of course. With another annoyed sigh, she headed towards the door of the warehouse and pulled it open. Much to her surprise, it was none other than her intellectual, good friend Oleg. He was dressed in his normal Saints wear.

"Good morning my Mousy One." He greeted with a smile. Kinzie looked around outside in confusion as the rays of new sunlight blinded her, oh yeah it was morning. When was the last time she had even looked outside? She racked her brain for an answer, it at least had been three weeks. She didn't like the outside, or people for that matter.

"Good morning Oleg." The ginger replied tiredly, then yawned. It was really dawning on her now, but she could repress it for Oleg's sake. "Here with some Saint's business?" Kinzie guessed. In that moment a miraculous thing happened. Oleg actually blushed! It wasn't very noticable, but Kinzie could most definitely tell. His cheeks turned a very subtle and light shade of pink.

"Actually no." Oleg replied. "I wanted to know if you'd like to attend Smiling Jack's with me to get some breakfast... It was the boss' idea." He added. Kinzie internally scowled. The damn boss was always trying to get her and Oleg together. It wasn't like Kinzie didn't have feelings for the Russian, she liked him a lot actually. He was kind, and a gentle giant, and intelligent too. She liked all those things about him. They were good qualities to have. After all, he was her Russian super man.

"Just breakfast?" Kinzie asked hesitantly, afraid of going outside. Oleg was aware of her fear too.

"I hear they make some pretty delicious pancakes..." Oleg said. Kinzie did like pancakes, they were her favorite breakfast food; especially with bananas.

"Smiling Jack's?" Kinzie asked raising a ginger eyebrow. It did sound nice, she was hungry, and that's the only other place she liked to go out in public. Oleg merely nodded as Kinzie looked up at him and his tall form.

"Where else?" He retorted sarcastically causing a smile to pull at the corner of Kinzie's full lips. He had a sense of humor too. Well, he wasn't always funny but still Kinzie thought it was cute that he was trying to make her laugh.

"Sure." She answered. "Just let me pull myself together." She said looking down at herself and grimacing at her sweat pants. "You can come in if you'd like."

"Okay." Oleg replied simply and followed the small girl inside her Inner Sanctum. Kinzie then went frantically searching for a pair of jeans, and at that moment, she immediately regretted that she never cleaned her home. She was actually surprised that she wanted to go outside. The outside usually bothered her. Maybe her little crush on Oleg was having an effect on her. Just maybe... "Kinzie?" Oleg called out from the other room pulling the computer expert out of her thoughts.

"Uh yeah?" She answered back and went to where Oleg was standing in the warehouse.

"What are _these_?" He asked in confusion as he held up some of Kinzie's _sex toys_. The redhead was at a loss for words. Why didn't she hide them before? She mentally kicked herself for leaving them out in the open like that. Of course, she wasn't embarrassed though. After all, she was only human, and all humans had their needs. Even sexual needs.

"My toys." She answered simply as she looked them over. She had all kinds of different vibrators, gags, and even anal beads. Oleg chuckled.

"That I can see my Mousy One." He replied then laughed again. "Why would you need things this ridiculous?" The Russian asked and that's when Kinzie got confused. What did he mean by that?

"Females get aroused too, you know?" She replied nonchalantly, and Oleg chuckled again.

"That I know too." He answered.

"Then what do you mean?" Kinzie asked flustered. Yeah, she was smart, but Oleg was playing some kind of trick on her or something. Men 101 was not something she had studied. Especially not Smart Russian Super Men 101. Oleg was definitely something unique.

"I mean, why would a beautiful intellect such as yourself need these useless things?" Oleg asked again as he put the toys down. "Surely, you can get a man... Or a woman?" Oleg concluded and this time it was Kinzie's turn to blush slightly. Did he just say the word beautiful?

"Oleg, it's not that simple." Kinzie replied. "I don't like people."

"But you like me." Oleg said with a slight smile and Kinzie smiled back. That much was true, she did like him. Kinzie just shook it off.

"Can we just get breakfast?" Kinzie asked with an awkward laugh. Oleg laughed too.

"Sure my Mousy One." Oleg replied. "Under one condition..."

"What?" She asked.

"Next time you feel like using one of these things... Why don't you call me instead?" Oleg asked, but he was all too serious and Kinzie was really speechless this time. And with that, the two were off to breakfast at Smiling Jack's.


End file.
